Earning His Wings

A beautiful young man stood alone in the middle of a wheat field; a light breeze causing the wheat to brush gently against his white pant leg. His bare chest gleamed in the sun. A soft smile played across his face, brightening his pale blue eyes. The young man’s hair tussled in the wind, making it look messy.

“God?” the young man asked. “Can you hear me? Am I dead?”

A melodic voice answered from the clouds, “It is I, my child. I can hear you now just as clear as I’ve always been able to. I’m sorry for your life being cut short.”

The young man’s voice was thin as he asked, “Where am I? This surly cannot be hell. Nor do I believe this is heaven.”

“No, you’re not in hell nor have you reached the gates of heaven yet. This, this is limbo I suppose. A place to prove that you deserve to join me in heaven or spend eternity in hell. Now Lucas, tell me why you deserve to join me in heaven,” God said, looking down at Lucas from the clouds.

“But God,” Lucas murmured. “I don’t deserve to go to heaven.”

“Why do you believe you don’t deserve to go to heaven my child?” God asked Lucas, curious to hear his answer.

“I’ve done terrible things in my life. I’ve lied and cheated. I’ve stolen. I’ve been selfish and self-indulgent. I grew up in prison for a reason,” Lucas told God honestly.

“Have you truly seen only the bad you’ve done? What about the lives you’ve touched? The people you’ve helped?” God asked.

“What lives?” Lucas asked, blind to all the good he’s done.

God sighed and said, “I’m sure you remember Emma Wright. When she first wrote you she was scared and broken. You gave her hope and taught her to laugh again. Then there’s Brandon Miller, your ex-cellmate. He was going to commit suicide that night. You calmed him down and reminded him he had something to live for. If not for you, his little girl would have never known her father. Shall I continue?”

“I…I really helped those people?” Lucas asked, shocked. He honestly thought he wasn’t worth much, worth anything.

“Yes, you truly did. I think all the good you did far outweighs the bad. I know in my heart you’ve earned your fate. Close your eyes my child. This will hurt for but a moment,” God told Lucas.

Lucas closed his eyes. He knew even though God said he’d done good in his life he deserved an eternity in hell, an eternity of pain.

A jolt ripped through Lucas’s back. It felt as though his flesh was being torn apart. A single tear rolled down his face as the pain subsided.

The sound of a thousand wings beating filled the air as God said, “Open your eyes my child and come home.”

Lucas opened his eyes to see himself surrounded by the souls of the prisoners who went before him, their lives too cut short by others. All had their wings and were smiling. Ready to welcome a new angel into their ranks.

Directly in front of Lucas was a gilded mirror. He gasped when he saw what had caused his pain. He too had been given wings.

“Welcome home my son,” God whispered as Lucas took flight for the first time.

Holiday's Are Here!

Winter is officially here. Over the last couple days the snow has started to fall, the tempature has plummetted, and the fucking Christmas decorations have popped up everywhere. I've never really been a big fan of winter. To much snow, to much ice, to little heat. I swear to God, I'm going to end up moving to Georgia. Maybe like Augusta. Near a good friend of mine.

So much has happened since Halloween. I lost my job as a deli worker in Elizabeth then Ryan and I broke up. Well I'm trying to break up with him but he's a stubborn bastard and isn't making it easy. And of course, every time he tells me he loves me and he'll change, I melt. But I don't love him. Not anymore. And I don't miss him either. I miss what we had but that's it. I miss having someone to call my own. Someone I can turn to with tears running down my face and they'll ask who hurt me. Because I deserve that. I deserve to be with someone who'll help me, who'll protect me. I guess when I thought Ryan was perfect for me, I was lying to myself.

Other things that have happened...I started hanging out with my mum's side of the family again. Of course things haven't changed yet with dad's side. Though I did find out Nichole is 8 weeks pregnant. I can't say I'm really surprised that she's pregnant what with Cory living with her and everything but 17 is kind of young to be a mother and her mother (my aunt Debbie) is actually fucking EXCITED her daughter is pregnant. I think it's going to be a girl. Our family seems to have a tradition. The oldest children are almost always girls. Except for with Aunt Mary but she's fucking weird anyways.

Thanksgiving was fairly boring. Not a whole lot happened but that's how most holiday's are around here. There's a reason I've never been big into celebrating. I'll give you one or two guess as to why that is...

With Christmas coming up I've been thinking a lot about what I want...I'd like either a donation to Locks Of Love, St. Jude's, or a gift card. Because as far as materialistic things go, I have no idea what I want. Oh and good books are always welcome.

What else to tell? I'm thinking about writing a book about a woman who just won't die. Over 1000 visits to the hospital and she's still kicking. But not until after Grandma's dead. Until then, a book about a girl and her sexual fantisies.

Well I promise to write more soon but until then, PEACE OUT!